I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
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