Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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