This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I didn't notice because vodka
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize