Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
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