he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
