Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize