There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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