Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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