Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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