Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
It's rum buckets o'clock
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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