My hand turned me down
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
