i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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