The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
i drank out of a bidet.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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