Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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