i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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