Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
