I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
