HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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