You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
