youre lurking in front of me
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
