Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
