they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
