You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
