i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
