Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
