no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
