Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
