Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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