mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
You did what with his pubic hair?
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