you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
