After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
How does it feel to date your dad?
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Randomize
