What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
