I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Randomize