New low: just hacked my moms facebook
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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