may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Randomize