hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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