All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
