The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
