I am spending my child support on dildos
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
