Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
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I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
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I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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