Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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