nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
