walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize