Bisexual people are plain selfish.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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