you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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