all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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