Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
