Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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