That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
They took my balls.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
