Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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