I've blown a few things in my day
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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