do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize
