Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Be still, my beating vagina.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
third nipple confirmed
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
