I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Of course I have a pirate flag
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
